This Mashujaa (Heroes) Day, I celebrate Sitawa1:08:00 AM
I had a breakdown right after Sondeka Festival and it was really bad...and as I have learnt, my life is a journey. Sometimes a breakdown happens in a place you have never been before and it takes much longer for help to come through; sometimes help never comes through and you have to teach yourself how to fix the parts that broke down if you want to keep on moving.
For the past five weeks, I had to learn how to move from crying myself to sleep to making love to those tears and using the river I cried to sail to beautiful spaces in my mind that I had never explored. I also learnt how to once in a while will myself to get off my boat to attend class, do speaking engagements; thank you Social Good Summit and What's Next by the Nest for hosting me in your health panels, thank you Victoria's Lounge (watch out for the episode) and PAW (Phenomenal African Woman) for the interviews, not forgetting my life partner for being there for the top 40 under 40 women in Kenya awards gala. (I mentioned these ones just to remind myself that despite the many other engagements and interviews I missed, I actually did a good job of willing myself to do stuff and for that I am proud of me...I know I failed terribly in the calls, texts and emails department and my social media hiatus didn't make things good)
Today being Mashujaa (Heroes) Day, I wanted to write an 'intellectual post' and use it to inspire myself and people going through what I went through in the past five weeks and as I was defining what hero means to me. I couldn't help and think about myself.
These 5 weeks taught me about Sitawa.
So this Mashujaa Day I celebrate Sitawa instead,
The naked Sitawa,
The hero in her own story,
The one who fights with things she cannot summarize in words or draw a picture of,
The one who fights battles she knows she may never win but never gives up the fight,
And even though she has failed over and over,
She still dares to show her nakedness, ready and willing to try again.
Today I celebrate Sitawa as she gloves up to fight another battle of not letting herself be swallowed by the scars of the battle she has been in for the past 5 weeks as she let's herself embrace the possibilities that are ahead.
What's your shujaa story?